Narrated Jabir (radhiAllaahu ‘anhu) that Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said:

"Iblees places his throne upon water; he then sends detachments (for creating dissension); the nearer to him in rank are those who are most notorious in creating dissension. One of them comes and says: I did so and so. And he says: You have done nothing. Then one amongst them comes and says: I did not spare so and so until I sowed the seed of discord between a husband and a wife. The Satan goes near him and says: You have done well. A’mash said: He then embraces him."

[Saheeh Muslim. Number 2813]

Imam Ibn Al-Qayyim (rahimahullaah) said:

"And due to the fact that this bond (between husband and wife) is from the most beloved affairs to Allah and His Messenger, so it is from the most hated affairs to the enemy of Allah (i.e. shaytaan). Therefore he hastens to split two people who love another for the sake of Allah—a love that is beloved to Allah—and brings two people together in loving that which is hateful and displeasing to Allah."

[Rawdatul Muhibbeen Wa Nuzhatul Mush-taaqeen, pg. 188]

Narrated Abu Huraira (radhiAllaahu ‘anhu):

Allah’s Apostle (ﷺ) said, “Fasting is a shield (or a screen or a shelter). So, the person observing fasting should avoid sexual relation with his wife and should not behave foolishly and impudently, and if somebody fights with him or abuses him, he should tell him twice, ‘I am fasting.” The Prophet (ﷺ) added, “By Him in Whose Hands my soul is, the smell coming out from the mouth of a fasting person is better in the sight of Allah than the smell of musk. (Allah says about the fasting person), ‘He has left his food, drink and desires for My sake. The fast is for Me. So I will reward (the fasting person) for it and the reward of good deeds is multiplied ten times.”

— [Sahih Bukhari Vol. 3, no. 118]

Shaykh Al-Allaamah Abdullaah Bin Muhammad Bin Humayd (rahimahullaah), former Imam of Masjid Al Haram, said:

"Your children are a trust and when you neglect them, then indeed you have betrayed them. It is obligatory upon every one of us to fear Allah with regards to the (affair) of his children and those under his care. The days go past and the end of a (person’s) life is close, and a person does not know when his life span will suddenly come to (an end). He must strive to teach his children beneficial knowledge and that he gives them training upon goodness, and nurtures them upon obedience to (Allah and His Messenger)."

— [Al-Fataawaa Wad-Duroos Fil Masjid Al-Haraam: by Al-Allaamah Abdullaah Bin Muhammad Bin Humayd (rahimahullaah): pages: 938-944]

(Source: dawatussalafiyyahmarriageandfamily.wordpress.com)

path-to-the-salaf:

Ibn al-Haaj al-Maaliki رحمه الله said:

A man should stay away from such thoughts and from this abhorrent characteristic which unfortunately is widespread, which is that when a man sees a woman he likes, he goes to his wife but he imagines that woman whom he has seen. This is a kind of zina, because our scholars said concerning one who takes a glass of water and imagines that it is wine that he is drinking, that that water becomes haraam for him. What is mentioned does not apply only to men, rather women are included in it too and that is even worse, because usually women nowadays go out and look at people, and if a woman sees someone whom she likes, she may keep thinking of him, then when her husband has intercourse with her she imagines that image which she has seen, so both of them may come under the heading of zina. We ask Allaah to keep us safe and sound. Al-Madkhal, 2/194, 195

Ibn Muflih al-Hanbal iرحمه الله said: 

Ibn ‘Aqeel said – and he emphasized the prohibition in al-Ri’aayah al-Kubra: If, when he is having intercourse with his wife, he imagines the image of another woman or a male, then he is sinning. Al-Furoo’, 3/51

Wali al-Deen al-‘Iraaqi رحمه الله  said:

If he has intercourse with his wife but in his mind he is having intercourse with someone who is forbidden for him, and he imagines in his mind that he is having intercourse with that forbidden image, that is haraam for him, and that is because he is imagining himself committing a haraam action. Tarh al-Tathreeb, 2/19

ابن الحاج المالكي رحمه الله :

" ويتعين عليه أن يتحفظ على نفسه بالفعل ، وفي غيره بالقول من هذه الخصلة القبيحة التي عمت بها البلوى في الغالب ، وهي أن الرجل إذا رأى امرأة أعجبته ، وأتى أهله جعل بين عينيه تلك المرأة التي رآها ، وهذا نوع من الزنا ، لما قاله علماؤنا فيمن أخذ كوزاً من الماء فصوَّر بين عينيه أنه خمر يشربه أن ذلك الماء يصير عليه حراماً … وما ذكر لا يختص بالرجل وحده بل المرأة داخلة فيه بل هو أشد ؛ لأن الغالب عليها في هذا الزمان الخروج أو النظر ، فإذا رأت من يعجبها تعلق بخاطرها ، فإذا كانت عند الاجتماع بزوجها جعلت تلك الصورة التي رأتها بين عينيها ، فيكون كل واحد منهما في معنى الزاني ، نسأل الله العافية " انتهى .

" المدخل " ( 2 / 194 ، 195 ) .

وقال ابن مفلح الحنبلي رحمه الله :

" وقد ذكر ابن عقيل - وجزم به في " الرعاية الكبرى " - : أنه لو استحضر عند جماع زوجته صورة أجنبية محرمة أو ذكر : أنه يأثم " انتهى .

" الفروع " ( 3 / 51 ) .

وقال ولي الدين العراقي رحمه الله :

" لو جامع أهله وفي ذهنه مجامعة من تحرم عليه ، وصوَّر في ذهنه أنه يجامع تلك الصورة المحرمة : فإنه يحرم عليه ذلك ، وكل ذلك لتشبهه بصورة الحرام " انتهى .

" طرح التثريب " ( 2 / 19 )

(Source: maktabasalafiya.blogspot.co.uk)

Question:
Will the righteous woman of the Dunya (worldly life) be from the Hoor Al-’Ayn (virgin women of Jannah) in the next life?

Answer:
The righteous woman in the Dunya, meaning the wife, will be better, better smelling, and more desirable to her husband than the Hoor Al-’Ayn in the Aakhira (next life). Indeed the Prophet (ﷺ) informed us that the first group to enter Jannah will be like a shining like a full moon.

— Shaykh Muhammad bin Saalih Al Uthaymeen (rahimahullaah)

[Taken from the Shaykh’s website here. Translated by Abdul Malik Merchant, June 2012]

umm-isa:

Different types of Oppression upon the Muslim Women - Shaykh Ibn Baz

In the name of Allaah, The Just, All-Wise. May peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad, his family, companions and all those who follow them in goodness until the day of Return.

As for what follows; The Grand Mufti of Saudi Arabia, Sheikh ‘Abdul ‘Azeez bin ‘Abdullaah aali Sheikh, may Allaah preserve him, discussed in one of his sermons the different types of oppression that befall the Muslim Women, may Allaah protect them, and here is a brief translation of them.

For the Arabic text please go to http://mufti.af.org.sa/node/1768

The different types of oppression upon the Muslim Women are: 

1- That the one who proposes to her cons her. 

Displaying lofty mannerisms from uprightness, good dealings, firmness upon the religion, soft speech and humility; however incidents thereafter clarify the lies of all that which were displayed. And this is from the types of oppression. 

2 - Mistreatment of her and dealing cruelly with her which are major errors. 

Our Prophet, may peace and blessings be upon him, said:

“The best of you are those who are best to their families and I am the best of you to my family.”

From amongst the slaves of Allaah are those who consider cursing and humiliating the women, due to the fact that he is her maintainer, (from masculinity). Howeverthis is in opposition to the legislation of Allaah.

Justice, benevolence, and polite speech are all desired from the Muslim.

Allaah the Most High says: 

“And say to My slaves (i.e. the true believers of Islamic Monotheism) that they should (only) say those words that are the best. (Because) Satan verily, sows disagreements among them. Surely, Satan is to man a plain enemy.” [17:53] 

3 - Also hitting her mercilessly whether that be for a reason or not.

Allaah has permitted hitting the women after boycotting and admonishing them. Hitting them lightly where it will not bruise as it is suppose to discipline them and not harm.

For this reason the Prophet, may peace and blessings be upon him, forbade hitting the women. Then ‘Umar, may Allaah be pleased with him, said: “O’ Messenger of Allaah, the women become audacious towards their husbands. Andso he permitted hitting them (lightly).

Then some women came to the houses of the Prophet, may peace be upon him, complaining about their husbands so the Prophet, may peace be upon him, said addressing the men:

“Indeed some women have visited the family of Muhammad complaining about their husbands and they are not the best of you.” [Abu Daawud] 

And he, peace be upon him, said:

“Let not a man beat his wife then be intimate with her at the end of the day.”

And ‘Aaisha, may Allaah be pleased with her, said:

“The Messenger of Allaah, may peace and blessings be upon him, never hit anyone with his hands, not a woman nor servant, except when he was in war in the path of Allaah.” 

4 - That the man calls her by the most offensive and repugnant of names.

The Messenger, may peace be upon him, said:

“Do not villify her nor hit her in the face.”

Meaning do not say to her; “may Allaah uglify you.”

Speech isn’t to be with obscenities. Rather it is to be polite and understandable so that the target at hand can be accomplished. 

5 - Likewise a lack of equity between spouses when one has multiple wives.

Because when Allaah allowed polygamy, He stipulated that the man must execute that which is obligatory upon him and that there be justice in that and he is capable of being equal between them.

Allaah, the Mighty and Majestic, says: 

“And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan-girls, then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (the captives and the slaves) that your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice.” [4:3] 

And in the prophetic tradition:

“Whoever has two wives and favours one more than the other, he’ll come on the day of Resurrection with one of his sides slanting.” 

6 - Preventing and obstructing her from visiting her family from time to time and getting together with her parents and siblings.

7- Burdening her with more than she can bear for that is in opposition to the way of the Prophet, may peace be upon him.

Muhammad, may peace and blessings be upon him, was the best of mankind and a pioneer for every Muslim. With that, when ‘Aaisha, may Allaah be pleased with her, was asked about his affair inside the home she said:

“He was at the service of his family and when the call for prayer would be called he would leave for prayer.” 

8 - What some of those whose faith are weak and their shyness and fear of Allaah are very low do of dictating to her the adorning of herself outside the house, unveiling, mingling with men whom she is able to marry, etc.

9 - What some of them do from preventing her from inheriting be it from her father, mother or even her children. All of this is sheer ignorance.

Allaah has given the women her right from the inheritance. He stipulated for the wife a fourth or an eighth. If she is a mother then a sixth or a third. If she is a sister then half or what remains. This is the arrangement of the inheritance as set by Allaah. He says:

“These are the limits (set by) Allaah (or ordainments as regards laws of inheritance), and whosoever obeys Allaah and His Messenger will be admitted to Gardens under which rivers flow (in Paradise), to abide therein, and that will be the great success. And whosoever disobeys Allaah and His Messenger, and transgresses His limits, He will cast him into the Fire, to abide therein; and he shall have a disgraceful torment.” [4:13,14] 

And He says at the ending of Chapter an-Nisaa:

“They ask you for a legal verdict. Say: “Allaah directs (thus) about Al-Kalalah (those who leave neither descendants nor ascendants as heirs). If it is a man that dies, leaving a sister, but no child, she shall have half the inheritance. If (such a deceased was) a woman, who left no child, her brother takes her inheritance. If there are two sisters, they shall have two-thirds of the inheritance; if there are brothers and sisters, the male will have twice the share of the female. (Thus) does Allaah makes clear to you (His Law) lest you go astray. And Allaah is the All-Knower of everything.” [4:176] 

So the right of the woman must be given to her whether she is a wife, mother, daughter or sister from that which Allaah has portioned for her. 

10 - What some of them do from restricting her expenses

 Allaah says: 

“No mother shall be treated unfairly on account of her child, nor father on account of his child.” [2:233] 

And He says:

“Lodge them (the divorced women) where you dwell, according to your means, and do not treat them in such a harmful way that they be obliged to leave.” [65:6] 

11 - What some of them do when one of them marries a woman, then afterwards he doesn’t want to be with her anymore not because of her religion or manners or the like but merely because he doesn’t want her anymore, he begins to harm her so that she will give back the dowry that he paid to her.

Allaah has prohibited this where He said: 

“O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will, and you should not treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the Mahr you have given them…” [4:19] 

And He says: 

“But if you intend to replace a wife by another and you have given one of them a Cantar (of gold i.e. a great amount) as Mahr, take not the least bit of it back; would you take it wrongfully without a right and (with) a manifest sin? And how could you take it (back) while you have gone in unto each other, and they have taken from you a firm and strong covenant?” [4:20-21] 

12 - Also spending her money that she has earned from working.

Some of these individuals wrong the woman and take her money. It could be her husband or father. Where he stipulates in the contract that all of her earnings are his and that he is her guardian.

All of this is oppression and transgression. The money that she has earned by working belongs to her that Allaah has secured for her. It is impermissible to take her money without her permission. 

13 - Or what some of them do by taking advantage of the women’s weakness and deceiving her by taking numerous loans out for long periods of time in her name placing her in grave debt. 

In ending, it is obligatory upon all the men to truly and sincerely fear Allaah and cooperate upon goodness.

May Allaah grant us success to that which He loves and is pleased with. May Allaah bless us by the Noble Qur’aan and benefit us by that which is contained in it from signs and wise remembrances.

Translated by Abu Fouzaan Qaasim

(via umm-isa-deactivated20140417)

We will split up quickly

Abu Dardaa to his wife: “If I get angry please me, and if you get angry I’ll please you. Otherwise if we are not like this, we will split up quickly.”

— [Rawdatul Uqalaa 1/72]

(Source: path-to-the-salaf)

Ibn al-Jawzee: “Once I learned the virtue of marriage and having children, I read the whole Qur’aan and then asked Allaah, the Most High, to give me ten children. He answered my request and gave me five boys and five girls.”

— [Siyar al-A’laam an-Nubulaa, 21/375]

(via kitabs-of-ilm)